Last 20

I've spent my last day being 20 as I spend all my days,apparently:worrying,crafting scenarios in my head and making sure everyone else (but me) is fine .
I'm turning 21 tomorrow,when did that happen?!Like,I have to pause for a moment when people ask me my age because I've stopped counting at 17.I still get giddy when I realize I can buy booze all on my own,I'm that sad...
Anyway,I'm tired of studying.I just want to be in Las Vegas right now,doused in neon lights and cheap lap dances,but we don't always get what we want now,do we?Ugh...I predict a (mild) panic attack at midnight,mark my words!
I've never been one to crave attention (that bad),so tomorrow's "small gathering" might prove a bit of a challenge-as long as there's chocolate and liquor,I can manage.
I've had my cake back home,so my wish is sealed and ready to go.But what I openly want from this brand new and personal year is to feel alive in the right sense of the word.I want to go through "21" not as another number,but as an experience.
Wish me luck,guys!I'm entering the great age of "official adulthood"... *shudders and runs away into the night*