Too much,not enough

I'm starting to believe I'm part of one massive joke that has everybody laughing but me.I always seem to be in some ridiculous situation or questioning my every decision made so far.Is it fair?I cannot say.Is it helpful?Maybe.Anyway,it's nice knowing I have a handful of friends who are willing to help me get through this...thing.Not knowing what to call it doesn't help at all...God,give me strength!

You may call me a downright loser,but today has marked my very first visit to a mall ever.I was,for lack of a stronger word,unimpressed because there were too many clothes and so much less excitement.But today also marked me seeing my first 3D movie (*cough cough* "The Hobbit:The Desolation of Smaug") and I'm still drunk on the awesomeness and epicness of it.It's good to have friends determined enough to drag you out of the house...

Have you ever felt so horrible as a human being that you didn't know where to hide from yourself?Because that's how I'm feeling right now.Yes,I have betrayed somebody's trust and I feel sick to my stomach about it.I don't know what's gotten into me,except sheer stupidity,maybe.And it sucks immensely-I am the only one to blame,I have no excuse,I fucked up.And I deserve all this torment...and then some.