Downhill

I have a major issue going on and I'm currently freaking out...

You see,I have to study my ass off.But I don't want to be studying my ass off.I'd rather be spending my summer's prologue drinking coffee,listening to some fine music and playing with my almost one month kitties.Instead,I have to somehow convince my brain that Romanian Literature is extremely interesting,that History is the most fascinating thing in the world and that Geography rules...everything that is to be ruled.While I do enjoy a good session of "knowledge jamming",I don't particularly care for an unstable combination of panic,insecurity and future challenges.

What if I'm not good enough?What if I screw it up completely?What if I disappoint everyone I know and love?What if I get hit by a bus while crossing the street?! And so on and so forth.What bugs me the most is not that I'm a walking mess,but that it's not a constant thing.Actually,I would describe my current psychological state by comparing it to a roller coaster:one moment I'm up and confident,the next I'm plunging into complete despair.

I really want to pass my exams with flying colors.I really want to get into my college of choice.I really want to see the world and enjoy my life to the fullest.Meanwhile,I have to stop whining about everything,man up and open a book.Even if it's not my first choice.

Wish me luck!