duminică, 8 ianuarie 2012

Malfunction

 

It's a haze,that's what it is!Not knowing how you got from here to there.Forgetting your name and your purpose.Being blinded by the blackness of your own eyes.Does it come from the body?Does it lurk in the mind?Is it madness in the womb or just a matter of weather and time?I'm so confused,so confused...Having to lean on strangers,fearing streets that were once familiar...I hope my heart dies before my soul,for I wouldn't want to be at the mercy of others-not even for one single day!Ah,my pointless dizziness!My everlasting imagination.My all.

It's nice!Yes,it is!I can say that now...You know,when I'm hurting,I don't pray-instead,I listen to music.Songs that make me cry,songs that make me smile,all kinds of feelings wrapped up in 3-5 minutes of sheer oblivion.But there are some songs on this planet that just have a life of their own.They just breathe.And they are the ones who basically empty my being,transforming it into a vessel for pure emotion.Those few seconds when you can't determine what's real and what's not,if you're even alive anymore,when the Universe collapses into you with a sweet thunder of silence...Yes,these are the songs that won't let me sleep at night.And it's nice to say that I've surrendered to their power without struggling.

 I am perfectly capable of living with just myself.I have learned (the hard way) not to be emotionally dependant on others,to control my social impulses,to enjoy loneliness and the sound of my own voice.Hell,cast me now on a deserted island,I'll build you an empire of one!It's safer this way.The more you love others,the more you will suffer,right?But,sometimes,the people in my your head just aren't enough.

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