Do you ever feel like just...screaming?Till your lungs collapse,till your voice fades away,till your face turns blue?I just...I just feel like doing so sometimes.Once in a while.Now.
It all seems so vain and pointless that I cannot even compute the reality of it all.Nor do I think I want to! Imagine understanding the feeble nature of our existence with every fiber of your being-I shudder at the mere thought of that foolish pursuit.
But these sort of experiences leave me pondering-how much?How much longer till I snap?What if I won't be able to get back together?What if there won't be anybody to mend me?What if it's all a joke and nobody feels like laughing anymore?
So I escape.How I can and as much as I can.A few minutes,a few hours,a few days at a time.Still,there's always that trigger,that seemingly innocent smirk of the world that says "Tick-tock,there goes the clock...".
I see this shell as being so tired and broken at times that I could just laugh myself to death.You know,faulty wiring...
Other times,I forget about the things that make me sad and a wave of bliss swallows me up-then,I can almost grasp the void howling and churning in the middle of my chest,between my breasts,inside my heart.Again,faulty wiring.
I'm not ungrateful,not even mad.I'm confused because I don't know how to deal with these nameless emotions that always seem to spoil a verging on perfection scenario.
I don't know,I don't know,I don't know.
It all seems so vain and pointless that I cannot even compute the reality of it all.Nor do I think I want to! Imagine understanding the feeble nature of our existence with every fiber of your being-I shudder at the mere thought of that foolish pursuit.
But these sort of experiences leave me pondering-how much?How much longer till I snap?What if I won't be able to get back together?What if there won't be anybody to mend me?What if it's all a joke and nobody feels like laughing anymore?
So I escape.How I can and as much as I can.A few minutes,a few hours,a few days at a time.Still,there's always that trigger,that seemingly innocent smirk of the world that says "Tick-tock,there goes the clock...".
I see this shell as being so tired and broken at times that I could just laugh myself to death.You know,faulty wiring...
Other times,I forget about the things that make me sad and a wave of bliss swallows me up-then,I can almost grasp the void howling and churning in the middle of my chest,between my breasts,inside my heart.Again,faulty wiring.
I'm not ungrateful,not even mad.I'm confused because I don't know how to deal with these nameless emotions that always seem to spoil a verging on perfection scenario.
I don't know,I don't know,I don't know.
3 comentarii:
that which you don't know can not harm you.
You think so?I believe it to be the exact opposite.
Yes, I think so. That is why you feel good after sleeping...
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