sâmbătă, 7 septembrie 2013

Raspy throat and grumpy attitude

Voice?What voice?Because mine got a bit damaged last night from all the screaming and cheering and general fangirling.But it was totally awesome and totally worth it,so I'll mend my raspy throat with some hot tea and bask in the glow of such a cool experience.
I don't mind at all because 1.I kinda sound like Scarlett Johansson and 2.people leave me alone.Seriously,how many times do I have to spell it out for them that I have no interest in gossip?
Honest to God,I DO NOT CARE.I can sleep very well at night without knowing what or who X did and such.I have enough issues and worries of my own,thank you very much!
Though I'm not going to stand here like a hypocrite and pretend I'm completely oblivious to the world around me,I don't seek it on purpose and I try to keep my "propagation" part at a minimum.
That being said,I should go put the kettle on...

Why do I always end up in the middle of somebody else's fight?And by "someone" I mean usually two members of my family who think the world is too peaceful sometimes.It's funny how they don't even have to be in the same room for me to become an emotional punching bag.
But I don't want that anymore:I'm not taking sides,I'm not giving advice,I'm minding my own business in a most silent and Swiss way.Which,naturally,makes me the grumpy and crazy one!I swear to all the gods and saints...
I'm damned if I talk and I'm damned if I don't.All I want is calm and understanding around here,yet I seem to receive the contrary of all that.Oh,if pride were less destructive!
It pains me-it pains me to be in this situation when I know we could all be so much more...human.
This plague of "grumpy attitude" is starting to piss me off.

I can't put my finger on it,but there's something about buying things that makes you feel good.And I'm not talking about a flat screen or a new car here-no,I'm talking about plain old shopping for simple things.
Just the idea of owning an item ,now matter how (un)important,triggers the sense of power we all long for in one way or another.
I know,I must sound bonkers,but I have started searching for meaning even in the most peculiar of situations,so bear with me here!Actually,this whole thing keeps me sane,since I was kind of a failure this summer/year/life.
Anyway,what I mean is that the pain of carrying a lot of stuff is outweighed by the pleasure they bring,real or self-inflicted,fleeting illusion.
And this reminds me I totally forgot to buy chamomile tea for my broken voice and "bothered" behavior...So much for power tonight!

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